In the heat of competition, emotions can run high, and as a coach, how you handle these emotions can significantly impact your team’s performance. A few years ago, I found myself in a situation that tested my emotional intelligence—and I failed that test. During a heated match, one of my players was assaulted on the field with no punishment given by the referee. In a moment of frustration, I stormed onto the pitch, yelling at both the player and the referee. My actions led to a red card, and in the ensuing chaos, a substitution was mishandled, almost costing us two points. Reflecting on this experience, I realized how a lack of self-control and emotional regulation had hindered my ability to make effective decisions under pressure.
The Importance of Emotional Intelligence in Coaching
Emotional intelligence has become recognized as a crucial aspect of leadership, not just in business but also in sports. Goleman (1995) famously claimed that 90% of success in leadership roles is due to Emotional Intelligence, a point echoed by April et al. (2012), who found a similarity between the EI levels of elite sports coaches and elite executives. This makes sense; both roles require the ability to manage emotions, foster relationships, and make clear-headed decisions under pressure.
Emotional Intelligence is not static—it can be developed and refined over time. The Four Branch Model of Emotional Intelligence by Mayer et al. (2008) categorizes Emotional Intelligence into four abilities: managing emotions, understanding emotions, facilitating thought through emotion, and perceiving emotion. These skills allow leaders to harness emotional information to guide thinking and behavior effectively.
Developing Emotional Intelligence: A Personal Journey
In my journey to improve my coaching performance, I’ve focused on developing my Emotional Intelligence. I took an online test from the Institute for Health and Human Potential (IHHP) that measured various aspects of my emotional intelligence. The results highlighted areas where I excelled and others that needed work. A critical recommendation was to take time to reflect on what brings the greatest meaning to my life and align my goals with these values. This self-awareness was the first step in improving my emotional management on the field.
For instance, I learned to appreciate my accomplishments and the process of achieving them rather than immediately shifting focus to the next goal. This practice of pausing to reflect has helped me manage the pressure and maintain motivation—key aspects of emotional self-regulation as described by Goleman and Boyatzis (2015).
From Reaction to Reflection: Applying Emotional Intelligence in Real Time
Recently, I was tested again in a similar scenario. My team was ahead 3-0, but after a series of dubious referee calls, the score was tied 3-3. Then, one of our players was sent off under circumstances reminiscent of the incident that had previously led to my red card. This time, however, I remained calm. Instead of letting frustration take over, I clearly assessed the game state, time left, and the personnel available. By managing my emotions, I was able to devise a strategy that played to our strengths: we set up in a 1-5-3-1 mid-block, focusing on defending key spaces and exploiting transitions. The players executed perfectly, and we won 5-3.
Conclusion
This experience underscored the power of emotional intelligence in coaching. By reflecting on past failures and actively working to develop my Emotional Intelligence, I was able to turn a potentially disastrous situation into a victory. Emotional intelligence is not just about staying calm; it’s about using that calm to think clearly, make strategic decisions, and lead your team effectively. For coaches, developing Emotional Intelligence isn’t just beneficial—it’s essential. As I continue my journey, I’m committed to further honing these skills, knowing that every setback is an opportunity for growth.